First off I want to say that the main inspiration for this was of course 'I turned Milwall into the most aggressive team in the world' by u/hurlball. As I am typing this out, u/Mankl1876 has posted a series with the same idea I had! The nerve! In all seriousness, I'm really enjoying your series lad, if you're reading this. I considered scrapping this, but after some of the unholy football I had to witness, there was absolutely nothing that was going to stop me sharing this story with the world.
I had seen that Ross County had a fair few Rosses in their squad, most notably with goalkeepers Ross Laidlaw, Ross Munro and Ross Doohan. I wondered, what would happen if this philosophy was taken to its logical extreme? Players who play for this club must have Ross in their name. I don't care whether it's Ross, or Rossi, or Ryan Shawcross, that four letter word must be present. Like Athletic Bilbao but with none of the care or quality, we will only accept a very specific kind of player at this club.
The beginning of the end
Introduction
My name is Ross Ross, from Co. Roscommon, Ireland. I have finally achieved my lifelong dream of managing my favourite club, Ross County. As a newly promoted team in the 2019-20 SPL, there is a great challenge in staying up this year. The board are confident I will steady the ship though, and put the club on the road to glory. How right they are. My assistant manager suggests we organize an inter-squad friendly, which is obviously pointless since we haven't nearly enough Rosses in the team for me to care. I tell him no.
Ross County run a tight ship. I have £150k for the transfer budget and £3.3k/pw for wages. This will initally be a problem, but not for long, as my first order of business is to transfer list every player without Ross in their name. Now I set about getting together a team. Most of my signings will be cheap players from Scotland's lower leagues, such as Ross Wilson, who I sign to be our backup keeper, as Ross Munro is out on loan at Raith and I can't recall him. Ross Laidlaw will take the starting job. Elsewhere, we have Ross Draper in central midfield, a solid player but he is out for two months with a damaged kneecap. Ross Stewart up front is not our first choice striker but he will do a fine job at Premiership level. My first attempted signing does not go well, as Ross Willox of Fraiserburgh rejects us. He knows all too well what I am planning and he wants no part of this nightmare.
I transfer list every player I can. Injured players are only waiting to be sold in January
Getting down to Business
Ross Millen, a solid right back playing for Kilmarnock is our first serious signing. I spend £22.5k to get him but it's well spent, given the relative quality of the players about to arrive. I see that Ross McCormack is available of a free. He's 33, but I believe he could still do a job for us. Unfortunately he believes we lack the financial muscle to sign him and will not talk with us. This will not be a problem for long. I shortlist Rangers midfielder Ross McCrorie, who is currently on loan at Portsmouth. I cannot afford his steep pricetag of £13.25m, so I can only hope I will be able to secure him on loan next season. Besides, I have other issues...
The squad have not taken my sweeping changes well. I wake up on my second day to find 15 angry e-mails from players wanting to know why they've been listed. I tell each and every one of them the truth--I have no space for them in my plans--but they whinge and whinge, "You haven't even seen me play yet" or "I only just signed a contract here!" Utter nonsense. I am in charge here, and I will not be told that I am wrong. When the press receive word of potential unrest in the dressing room, I tell them exactly the same thing.
https://preview.redd.it/42ajfhs8zth51.png?width=1366&format=png&auto=webp&s=9f71c910c09aa3b1f283559c28bf2eb193dac94b
Pre-Season
Disaster strikes when the board inform me of the pre-season tour in Austria they have planned. I haven't signed nearly enough players! I need to get these players out the door fast and then replace them, they're bringing down Team Cohesion and Morale by their being here alone. Despite this, at the team meeting I manage to raise morale with a fairly uninspired introduction. This is not the first time these players will confound me. I put in an offer for Scott Ross, a center-back for Cove Rangers, when I receive this ominous reccomendation.
It's going to be a long season.
We play our first match against ASK Eibrichsdorf, going with a very standard 4-4-2. As our team is not complete yet, this formation will do for now. I am not too concerned about overall performance, but I keep an eye on players called Ross for now. Despite dominating possession, Ross Stewart fails to find the back of the net in a very pedestrian 0-0 draw. I'm beginning to think goals might be a problem.
Our next game is against FK Austria Vienna, a team I actually know. I'm rather nervously expecting a demolition, but to my surprise, we take the lead! Michael Gardyne scores, which disappoints me, but it was from a long Ross Millen free kick, so I'm beginning to think I may have something. They equalize and the match finishes 1-1, but I'm not too concerned.
Things really get going in our third game against Wiener Sport-Club. Ross Stewart scores two goals, both assists from Ross Millen. God, this is actually working! We might even be able to challenge for Europe! Our last match doesn't matter, as I am focused on bringing in new players.
I bring in young Scottish left-back Ross McKinnon on a free, followed by a signing for the future in Seb Ross from the Aberdeen Reserves. He's an attacking midfielder but can play in the center of the park too, but I have to pay to get him. £60k takes a big chunk out of our transfer budget and so far only goalkeeper Tommy Dixon-Hodge has left, on a free transfer to Queen of the South. I offer center-back Sean Kelly to clubs, and mercifully receive a £77k bid from Rotherham. He's all too happy to be leaving.
Youngster Harry Paton is loaned out to Airdrie for the season, for the fee of £1k a month, which should finance a good few of our next signings. We raid the lower leagues, signing players from the likes of East Fife, Stirling and Buckie Thistle. Several free agents are also added.
Our starting lineup is complete just in time for the League Cup.
I have not prepared adequately. We will have a bench soon enough.
May God have mercy.
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/w8i9mutubqh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/y6o9eao37sh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/xxlwgdapcth51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/pz96zhx72vh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/ydpddedxssh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/16irm1rhuph51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/5sk1knc1cvh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/v5m878vm2vh51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/tylbgmrkoth51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/vj9rru8s3ph51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/uykikg4gvuh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/w0dm2avckph51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/5kcdzkp5yvh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/uq7oqi4qush51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/l2aigesduqh51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/3lj7ndbp8qh51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/idptvpnnnth51.jpg){kind=link}
No comments:
Post a Comment