Part I of II
With Football Manager 21 on the horizon, many are eagerly awaiting its arrival, done with Football Manager 20 forever. But not me. There are still unanswered questions that this game can solve. Questions that have confounded the community for aeons. Questions like, "how would PSG fare if they were forced to play Phil Jones up front every game?"
But worry no more. The wait is over. Finally, the collaboration the world has been waiting for. Phil Jones ✕ Paris Saint-Germain is here.
But why? The benefits are twofold. One – to see whether managing PSG really is the easiest and most soulless job in Football Manager, and two – to see whether surrounding Phil Jones with world class footballers can turn him into a top top striker. Will Phil Jones bring PSG crashing down, or will PSG bring Phil Jones along for their inevitable march towards more domestic silverware…?
Intro
I'm barely through the door at the Parc des Princes before submitting a £20m bid for the next Gerd Müller. West Ham are also interested, but are probably taken by surprise to see the footballing front for the Qatari royal family gazump their deal. I promise him he'll be our club captain, penalty taker, and free kick taker, and after a series of unnecessarily complex negotiations he finally signs somewhere around the dotted line. Close enough.
https://preview.redd.it/165ykwpr20v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6bd4731a3960f4a4ebaeedc5acea380f07d16784
https://preview.redd.it/xcbwqp8t20v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d02a745fab0c8ee6336716628098c71319105696
Thiago Silva is understandably annoyed at losing the captaincy, but relents far quicker than expected. He probably realises that in the grand scheme of things I could literally appoint a rooster as club captain and we'd still win everything. In any case, Jones will be playing at the opposite end of the pitch to him anyway.
Tactics & Transfers – Easy Mode
To see just how easy managing PSG can be, even with Phil Jones leading the line, I opt to play with the default cheat formation, the 4-2-3-1 gegenpress, and change literally nothing about it. No player roles are tweaked, no individual instructions are changed, nothing. Set and forget.
https://preview.redd.it/0x0amvdu20v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7f4d0f3f0072e3daa8dc0662e9adcc89577041a5
I do, however, make the necessary adjustments to fulfil the transfer promises made to our new talisman – putting him as the first (well, only) choice taker on penalties and free kicks – and I also alter our corner routine so that all corners are aimed towards him.
My tactical masterclass out of the way, I move onto the issue of strengthening an already strong squad. Phil Jones himself is the first name on the teamsheet, with Neymar and Mbappé on the flanks supporting him, but I still think we need a true playmaker to sit in the hole. Being PSG, this issue is solved in a couple of minutes as I throw £105m at bringing in Bernardo Silva from Man City. If this lot can't get Phil Jones firing, no-one can.
https://preview.redd.it/lu7dznpv20v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=28faf0c26ac7066dc643ae40357b84a2607b6b61
My only other signing is to bring in Alex Telles for some £40m competition at left back. This empties the transfer fund completely, meaning we lack any depth at right back, and ideally I'd have liked to add a bit more depth to central midfield too – only Verratti, Herrera, and Paredes are of great quality there. But it should be enough for now. The board will go on to invent a number of new sponsors throughout the season to top up the bank balance, so I needn't really have worried about such minor matters like transfer fees or wages anyway.
The fans are thrilled by the Silva signing, immediately boosting shirt sales. It's disappointing to see the Phil Jones signing hasn't had the same effect – in fact, the fans think we've overspent for him. I'm surprised they care, given our funds are limitless.
House, S.G.
The medical team point out the well-known fact that Phil Jones is incredibly injury prone. Miraculously he's not injured at present, but the success of Phil Jones ✕ Paris Saint-Germain will hinge on him staying fit. We already have five world-class physios at the club, but it's not nearly enough. The board let me hire more, and two additional expert physiotherapists are quickly recruited.
https://preview.redd.it/cdiaakoz20v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1c863ef64976388c867da004e8453b3c676031c8
https://preview.redd.it/24czr5y130v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a18605493080e11c400c963895ef866175efffb
Fitness coaches are next on the agenda. The existing pair are decent, but I'm still sceptical of their ability to keep Phil Jones fit. Three of the best fitness coaches money can buy are signed in their stead. The board also allow us to improve our training facilities. I assure them it's about helping all our players, but in truth this vast outlay is all going towards keeping a defender at the spearhead of our attack.
Training will also be key for Jones' chances of success. He's immediately set up to train as a pressing forward, with an added focus on free kicks (his current ability of 3 is a little behind the likes of Di Maria and Neymar). He's also in need of some traits to his game, having only developed the ability to "dive into tackles" so far in his career. Against the logical advice of my staff I try and teach him to "try tricks".
Seeing as our striker position is now locked down by one man, I opt to re-train loanee Mauro Icardi into a central attacking midfielder. This will prove to be a gruelling undertaking for the Argentine – whilst Phil Jones dutifully goes about his new training regime no questions asked, Icardi kicks up a season-long tantrum about being asked to play slightly deeper, almost as if I'd forced him to play alongside Maxi López.
Pre-Season is All About Fitness
Fearing the worst for Phil's safety, I cut down the club's ten game pre-season schedule to a mere five, hoping to try and get him match sharp without injury. He makes it through the first game without scoring, but most importantly without getting injured. There's a scare midweek, as he picks up the first injury of his PSG career, but thankfully it's only a minor knock, and he's able to play in the next friendly as well.
Things are going better than expected. Two games played with no major injuries, and he goes one better against the Austrian semi-professional outfit Gleisdoft 09, scoring a tap-in from a yard out in the 91st minute! The rest of the game had seen him mostly stood around watching as his teammates scored world-class long-range strikes, but he's obviously more in the mould of van Nistelrooy. He scores again in a 5-0 drubbing of Sporting, but has a quiet game in our final friendly against Villarreal. It's early days. And it genuinely is all about fitness at this point. Somehow, against all the odds, he makes it through pre-season unscathed.
https://preview.redd.it/g8c25tu530v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1e6a723703718428ada52092ba71411d655d17d5
Le Curtain Raiser
Our first competitive fixture is here. The one-game showpiece Trophée des champions. A chance for Phil to win some French silverware for the first time. And, in true Phil Jones fashion, he pulls a hamstring the day before, ruling him out. I consider using painkilling injections, but decide it's not worth the risk. Cavani comes into the side to replace him, as we beat Stade Rennais without really trying, but it's a hollow victory.
https://preview.redd.it/f92x572830v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4556868cd986a93e598ef6834e0ce0cf7e9c17a0
We draw the Ligue 1 opener in Le Classique against Marseille, again with Phil watching from the stands. But by the time our game against Metz comes along he's ready for selection. Still carrying a slight knock, but I'm done waiting. I throw him in anyway.
https://preview.redd.it/t20dznp930v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=699a004f42757b55d9bd0c4c06f33af28fd042ff
We annihilate Metz 7-0. Whether it was Phil's influence, or the glut of world class players surrounding him, I don't know. He doesn't score or assist, but he makes it through the game without aggravating his injury, which is a victory in itself.
Like a Duck to Water
Everyone knows the pressure strikers are on to score their first goal for their new clubs. Phil Jones doesn't know the meaning of the word pressure. Literally. In only his second start, against the mighty Nantes, he hits a cushioned volley into the back of the net from 12 yards out, doubling our slightly-precarious-but-not-really-because-we're-PSG lead en route to a man of the match performance!
https://preview.redd.it/tm2hj9gb30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5145af1ff6c84d4a9fcd8e3a8dfef8dc89ef9467
He scores again in the following game, before netting a first half brace away at Montpellier. Sadly any hopes of an early hattrick are dashed when Di Maria, possibly annoyed at being outscored by Philip Anthony Jones, picks up a needless straight red, after which we slump to a 2-2 draw. Despite the dropped points we're still top of the league – in all honesty, it's already less of a challenge than I thought possible.
https://preview.redd.it/97pv6oc140v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=096abcd9ef028bbbc548b32bc15439fdc0eb8feb
There's a minor setback as Phil picks up a (tactical?) shoulder injury that keeps him out of England duty, and then goes five games without a goal. But as the saying goes, you don't keep Phil Jones out for six games in a row. He returns to form with a vengeance, hitting a first half hattrick (the first hattrick of his career, believe it or not) in a 3-1 win over Stade Brestois.
https://preview.redd.it/2kcm6err30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f6f74f24e400dd7fd63361ea94c468228d45d2a
He scores a brace (including an outrageous 25-yard screamer) a couple of games later, against the formidable Dijon, and picks up the Ligue 1 Player of the Month award as a result. Perhaps I'd underestimated him. Barely a couple of months into his PSG career, and he's already making a mockery of the league. Maybe Ibrahimović wasn't actually that good after all…
https://preview.redd.it/wwrmty2p30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6e979185424b8a590de640d3ad872892e5f5ed7e
CL Struggles
Winning the league at a canter, even dropping Cavani for an England centre half, is shaping up to be par for the course for PSG. The real test for us, and for my attempt to turn Phil Jones into Robert Lewendowski, will come in the Champions League.
And the Champions League doesn't go easy on us. We're thrown into a bona fide group of death alongside Atl̩tico Madrid, Inter, and Young Boys. We lose the opener to Inter Рthe first game in which it felt like having a clumsy defender leading the line might not be the best tactical choice Рbefore only narrowly scraping a 93rd minute victory against Young Boys thanks to some inspiration from the ever-brilliant Bernardo Silva.
https://preview.redd.it/k0u3m1yx30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f3e9287dbc9b811042deb391c0a9ef09229c41ba
Phil remains goalless at the halfway point in the group as we lose at home to Atletico Madrid. Not only would going out at this stage potentially result in my dismissal, it would ruin Phil's chances at winning the individual awards his career deserves.
The Walk in the Park, Continued
Despite making Phil Jones our penalty taker (against the advice of my staff, who ask me every week to change him for someone more suitable) we don't win a single penalty for months. But once we get our first one, the floodgates open. Though nearly costing us victory after missing his first penalty, against Nimes (Neymar bailing him out with a glorious solo goal), I refuse to remove Phil's name from the penalty takers list. And he rewards my faith by scoring four of the next seven penalties we get. You can't teach that kind of proficiency.
A suspension for an accumulation of bookings (this is Phil Jones after all) sees Cavani make a rare appearance in a predictable 2-0 cup win over Strasbourg, but he's immediately dropped again for the return of the King. And what a return it is.
https://preview.redd.it/vg4lysve30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cb4600b58ba7af325e029006974d70e988ee31bd
https://preview.redd.it/hefwjbag30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9df7dacc8eacf4154c046acfb80a3f9b1d97fc9f
Another hattrick. The third goal from a direct free kick. In doing so Phil puts himself atop the league rankings for goals, average rating, and player of the match awards. And it's not like his presence is disrupting the rest of the team. We're unbeaten in the league approaching the halfway point, seven points clear, and are still in all the cup competitions. Even handicapping the team in this way, it's absurd how easy things are. Only the Champions League has been a challenge, but we're not out of it yet.
To be Continued…
So far, so easy. And I really have to stress just how little effort I've put in to this - we have one tactic (the 4-2-3-1 gegenpress), and that has not been altered at all all season. I rotate the rest of the team a bit, but mostly keep the best players playing as often as possible. Nobody from the youth or reserve teams has been looked at at all. And Jones starts every single game possible, and has only been substituted a couple of times when the game's already won and we have another game soon after, just to try and keep him fit!
But with half a season still to play, it's not over yet. Can Phil Jones continue his push for the Ligue 1 top goalscorer award, will PSG still win everything regardless, and can the team get out of the Champions League group without letting Icardi or Cavani have a chance up front? Find out in Part II, which will be released next week…
https://preview.redd.it/yy9hxrni30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8370d17fd0eafca06f32a5f9a472d82b96ca9b2
https://preview.redd.it/1wde9oik30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd68432060ae90693eeba800f31466c082cd53fb
https://preview.redd.it/v00jfpml30v51.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b10326b821d24c8215d6d355c525ae7a0c4df169
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/tqpl8dsf54v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/a03pa521h3v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/j2bu8oiipzu51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/34vuoqid64v51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/180ko94qh4v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/ieuvbry064v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/rl8bdawk75v51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/5q42gx6933v51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/gn1769t0xzu51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/rszjhmycd3v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.imgur.com/soUPh5O.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/4x7keh52k2v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/bq3mixq5h4v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/qmw9s8bhb6v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/06ri1lh0i0v51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/91p02vhsc5v51.png){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/rew0hub6u1v51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/6wddjistv0v51.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/ixj0pfhm62v51.png){kind=link}
No comments:
Post a Comment